I think I may be delusional...

I am sitting here right now printing off the required forms to apply to the Midwives College of Utah.

The past few weeks I have had this nagging feeling/voice in my head saying to me to just go and do it...stop waiting for the "right" time (previously I have said that I would wait til my youngest child was 10 before starting midwifery schooling) and just go and do it. The voice has been getting louder and louder. I have no idea why, other than the fact that I have just finished reading "Ina May's Guide to Childbirth" and so much of it resonated with me. So, I started reading online tonight again at the MCU website. And I discovered two cool things...1) for some reason living in Alberta qualifies me to apply for a student loan to pay for my schooling (no where else has that priveledge); and 2) living in Alberta puts me at an advantage because I don't have to travel somewhere else to do my clinical practicum work (I don't know why, but that's cool none-the-less!). So it kind of makes sense for me to start this process now, instead of waiting until we move to BC in the future. In some ways I think I may have lost my mind. Here I am 14 weeks pregnant with my third child and my oldest child being 3.5. I know that midwifery courses are going to be hard and a lot of work, especially so since I will be doing the courses via the distance education program so I will have to be extra disciplined with myself. And yet, I have found all sorts of reasons to go ahead and apply anyways. After this baby comes I won't be taking doula clients for at least a year, so I'll have that time on my hands that I would otherwise be doing client interviews, prenatal visits etc. Obviously I will have one more child to care for, so it's not like I'll have all this time on my hands, but I could make it work. And Jesse is completely supportive. I plan on talking to my midwives more about this at my appointment in a few weeks, as both of them did the distance program through MCU. They'll be able to give me an insiders POV, and, better yet, will likely be happy to be my preceptor when I get to the hands on clinical stuff.
So what do you think?? Have I lost my mind??? Part of me thinks yes, but in a twisted way the stars couldn't be better aligned...