Renovation HELL

So, we started quasi-renoing our place last spring. (side note: why the hell do I feel the need to start all these big ass projects when I am pregnant?! House renos, midwifery school...I am completely nuts) We ripped out our fireplace and had one of Jesse's work associates come over to tape and mud. Well, apparently halfway through the guy decided that he didn't want to do it anymore and he just stopped coming over, stopped returning our calls. He left ALL his mudding tools here. Weird. Ok, so we had a half mudded, half sanded drywall wall for several months. We don;t know anyone else who does drywall mudding, so we decided to just put that on hold and get started on replacing our disgusting tri coloured carpet (baby blue, baby pink and this awful grey/purply colour...ewww!). We went with a company that we'd heard really good things about from some other friends who had used them. I liked them because they were totally okay with pre-ordering the carpet and unrolling it in their warehouse to off-gas so that the carpet wouldn't do the bulk of it's off-gassing in my house. Well, that was a big shitshow too...the day that they were supposed to start they said to expect for them to be there at 9am.
They didn't show up until 3pm. The next day they were supposed to show up at 9am, and they did a little better and showed up at 10:30am. The guy who had come in to do our estimate said that it would take two days for them to do the carpet, one day to rip it all up, and one day to install. So I, with three kids ages 4, 2 and 5 weeks at the time, planned to have our entire family out of the house for those two days. Well, lo and behold, it took them a third day AND then they tell me that they somehow mismeasured and they didn't have enough carpet.
AAGGHH!!! It took 3 weeks for them to order the extra carpet and come to put it in. And the install job leaves something to be desired. We complained and they came back to fix what they could, but the biggest problem is the way they did a cut in the hallway...you can totally see the line and there's nothing they can do about it.
*sigh*
So, fastforward to the Christmas holidays. Jesse has an aquaintance that he did a basement reno on for a mutual friend. We asked this guy (we'll call him S) to come over and give us an estimate for painting most of the interior walls and finishing the fireplace spot. S said that he would give us a great deal ($2200 for 7 rooms plus ceilings, fixing the fireplace spot, filling all holes) and that he would come and do it while we were away in Kelowna for Christmas. Great! Not only do I get to go away and come home to a freshly painted home in the beautiful colours we chose, but I don't have to deal with ANY of it because I won't be here for the work.
Fuck was I wrong.
We came home to the house fully painted, it was great. It was also 10pm and we had just gotten home from one of the worst Christmases EVER so we weren't really paying attention to the details. We paid him and said thank you and he went on his merry way. The next morning we started looking around and the list of problems just got longer and longer. Not only did he not paint the ceilings in two of the rooms, but he snapped off one of the legs on our entertainment stand, he broke our computer desk, there are chunks of roller in the living room wall, he didn't fill half of the holes, and the paint job in our room was shoddy at best. He didn't take off any of the faceplates for the lightswitches or plugs so you can see where he cut around them, and, this is the best part...
HE PAINTED AROUND OUR BED.
I don't know what the hell compelled him to do that...who the fuck paints around the bed???? Our bed is on a plywood box platform, so it's not like it's big and cumbersome or anything. We almost missed that little detail too...we only found it the day we had him coming back to fix some of the other things. Jes was moving stuff around preparing for S to come back and when he moved our bed there it was; a big blue bed-shaped spot where S hadn't painted at all. Fucker. Who the hell cuts around a bed??? SEriously?! Geesh.
What's sick is this guy is a professional painter and he's doing a job over at the Glenbow Museum right now. The poor suckers at the Glenbow. Oy.
We're still not finished with this guy, either...he has made and cancelled 3 appointments to come over and finish the ceilings and painting over the fill holes. He's supposed to come on Sunday at 10am, but I'll believe it when I see his face on my doorstep.

Wheee! Now all we have left is replace ALL the windows in the house, replace the lino in the kitchen, bathrooms and laundry room, get new baseboards and trim installed, replace the frames to the doors and closets, replace the doors. I'm missing something but I can't remember what at the moment.
Shoot me now. What the frack were we thinking????