Changed my comment settings

Now all you anon commenters can either choose to come out of the woodwork, or not comment at all. I hate anon comments! Show your face dammit lol

Holy boobiejuice batman!

I took Indigo for his last checkup with my midwife today. At 7 weeks old he weighs...

15lbs!!! And he measures 25 inches tall! Holy crap!! 5lbs gained in 7 weeks! Hooray for breastmilk lol
Loooooooook at these cheeks!! Oh I am just so in love with this little boy...


In other news...
My friend Pam and her kids were here Monday and Tuesday visiting from Seattle before heading out to Ontario for a month to see family and attend a couple of weddings. We took a day trip out to Drumheller to the Royal Tyrrell Museum and had a really fun (albeit long and exhausting!) day. Stupidly I forgot to check my camera battery levels and my camera died after taking only two pictures. Argh! The two pics I got are pretty cool though. They have this bubble wall at the end of a dark hallway, and beside it it talks about the possibility of airpockets being the source of the beginning of life and how it is still one of the biggest questions in paleontology. So these are mine and Pam's kids checking out the wall:




I had my cousin over last weekend for dinner. She's the one who was due 5 days after me with her first baby. She ended up going 10 days past her due date and had her baby girl 2 weeks and 1 day after Indigo was born. We were really tickled at the size differences between Indigo and her baby girl (who was 7lbs 13oz at birth). I get a real kick out of these pictures!! Her daughter is about 9lbs and 4 weeks old in these pictures, and Indigo is about 15lbs and 6 weeks old.



And lastly...a couple of really cute pictures of my little sweethearts :) Can I just say that it is some feat to get an in-focus picture of all three at once?! These aren't dead-on focussed either, but better than nothing!

Oh Nova, my sweet little helper. She just loves her little brother. And she changes diapers!! The other day I was in the bathroom and I could hear Indigo waking up from a nap...next thing I know Nova is handing me a wet diaper and telling me that she changed Indigo all by herself!!


And then, of course, we must not forget the obligatory naked cheeser face pic of Faeryn lol I swear she wears clothes sometimes!!


Not a great picture as far as focus is concerned, but I love it nonetheless...ah sweet sibling love

Just once more

I just watched my birth pic video that my friend and doula Tracey made for me and my heart is just *aching* to be pregnant again...just one more time. I know, I know...how crazy am I to be wanting to be pregnant and give birth again already, when I have a 7 week old baby sleeping in my bed at this very moment! Truth be told, another baby (especially another surprise pregnancy) would probably mean very bad things for my relationship with Jesse...but ohh...I can't help it. I am so sad to think that Indigo is my very last baby. When I was pregnant I had sort of come to a place in my heart that was okay with being done, but now I think I've changed my mind lol It all goes so quickly...it seems like only yesterday I was peeing on that stick, and now here I am with this ginormous 7 week old who is already growing far too quickly for my liking. Not to mention the 4 and 2 year old daughters sleeping in the room next to me! I can't believe that they are so grown up already! Nova would be going to preschool this year and kindergarten next year if we did the school thing. Faeryn is old enough to fall and smash her head open and need stitches! Where the heck did my chubby little babies go?!!
It's very hard for me to not resent Jesse for not wanting more babies. And I know that it's got to be hard on him in other ways...being the mostly sole bread winner and all.
But biology just doesn't work that way...it doesn't think logically like that, you know? In all honesty, even if I did have another baby I would probably pine for yet another, and another. I don't know if I will ever feel *done* like some women do. Everyone says you just know when you are done with having babies, but I don't know if it works that way for all women. I certainly feel like "holy fuck why would I want another one of these?!" on the days that are hard and frustrating and just plain exhausting. But in the moments of pure love and adoration and beautifulness...*sigh*.
I don't dare bring up this subject with Jesse, it would only end in me having my feelings hurt and him thinking I am just off my rocker lol Unless he loses his mind somewhere or something, I am done whether I like it or not. I'm trying to just be in the moment and enjoy Indigo's babyness and the girls' young years and not get caught up in what could or might have been. Too soon I will have teenagers and that will be a whole different world of freedom and worry.
But oh...just once more....

A first for Faeryn

Stitches!



She and Nova were playing on our deck today and she fell headfirst into a brick ledge that juts out about a foot from the window. Poor baby :( She was soooo brave but she did NOT like having the doctor sew her head up and I ended up holding her in my lap and restraining her to finish the job. That was fucking awful. Awful! It was so hard not to bawl my face off watching my poor baby be so upset and knowing that I had to make her do it anyways because it was what was best at the time.

She's totally fine now, btw...happy as a clam and quite proud to show off her stitches lol I always knew she'd be the first of my kids to get stitches....

picture post!

edited to add: oh balls...the pics are too big. fuck it, i am not going back and redoing them all!

so bittersweet

Jesse has a bedtime ritual of dancing the girls to sleep. He's been doing it with Nova since she was about 6 months old. Recently he's been slowly moving away from dancing to just snuggling to sleep as Nova is getting a bit old (and very heavy!) and also because he hasn't been able to dance them as of late due to a work injury. Most nights he dances them for a few minutes to their bedtime music (rave music, btw LOL) and then lays with them for a while. Tonight he offered to dance and for the first time both girls opted not to dance, to just snuggle instead.
I cried when he told me. My babies! I am so proud of them for making the transition, but it also really hits home just how grown up my kids are getting Jes felt emotional about it too...I think that secretly he's glad that he can carry on the tradition with Indigo for a few years at least before being done with it completely.

6 weeks

Good grief how is my baby 6 weeks old already?! Shit time flies. I keep saying that too, lol.
He's HUGE. Huge I tell you. He fits into sleepers that are 6 and 9 month sizes!! Ahhh!! I am so so curious to see how much he weighs at our appointment next week with my midwife.
And yes, pictures. I have a ton...they are all sitting on my camera waiting to be uploaded! I promise I will get around to that sometime before he's one LOL!!

I had more to say but the lil-big man is hungry so it will have to wait until another night!